Transitory Elation

When everything is mechanical and as passive as breathing, it’s always a relief when a different stimulus, something out of the ordinary, springs out to break your monotonous routine. It’s like cross-stitching; with every in and out of the needle, there’s a ready hole waiting. And each hole is calculated to finish into a bigger picture, your pattern.

My life is like that right now. It’s not that I don’t smile or rather unhappy with what’s happening, in fact I laugh everyday and I love what I’m doing—most of it. It’s just that each day is no different than the other. However, when night comes and I want to sleep, but I can’t, that’s when I get to see through a rather sad perspective.

For this reason, an offhand statement, of a certain person has somehow moved me to temporary elation. It was technically a joke. But people have this tendency to misinterpret, maybe intentional, and think that there is something between the lines when they have a dormant or active affinity for the person who verbalized a harmless dialogue. They try to give meaning to something meaningless. A lot would say that this is desperation and complete malice, I say otherwise. Not because I am one of those culprits but for people living amidst monotony, it’s our sweet escape.

I need not drench myself in ice-cold water or drink a tongue-burning coffee just to make contact with reality. That is something I am well-acquainted with. I do admit that I have imaginative tendencies but what happens in my head remains in my head. I’m merely expressing the relief and what an icebreaker that unexpected and completely mind-boggling phenomenon was.

I never imagined someone saying or rather using a series of flattering words directed to me. It’s not a compliment, it’s more of a situational parody stated with elating vocabulary and in a nonchalant manner. The nonchalance amplifies the feeling I get. It’s so casual that maybe it’s within the zone of the unconscious. Of course, the unconscious is the truth because it’s beyond control and censorship. Now this is me—daydreaming.

Well, with the writing of this post I now chose to let that go. An immediate return to systematic day-by-day lifestyle—maybe I’ll hear something as eyebrow-raising and stimulating as before. Not necessarily from the same person, maybe from someone else. Who knows, maybe from him too? Hope exists for the hopeless.